Last night, Traci and I went to a sneak preview of Michael Bay's new box office stinker "The Island". Thankfully the tickets were free, had I been subjected to the $9.75 for admission I probably would have murdered a large group of innocent bystanders upon my exit from the theatre.


Prepare for a rant folks... Here we go.

This movie blew. It jumped the shark 40 minutes in with the two crap-bag male and female lead characters (I'm not acknowledging their names it was so bad) fall 70 stories down a skyscraper on a gigantic metal corporate logo, on fire, while being shot at by assassins in helicopters, only to safely land in some nets on the tarmac below. Ohh, they don't come out of this debacle unharmed, the male character managed to get a nasty scrape that required some neosporin... Other than that, they lived another day and managed to evade the worlds worst aiming assassins, a 700 foot plunge to their doom and other improbable situations. I think the only thing that could have made it even better would be if they were riding this flaming piece of bullet laden steel down the 70 story drop while fighting ninjas on it. That would have made it much more believable.

Funny how the tag line for the movie is "Plan your escape", it is pretty fitting considering I was planning my escape from the theater the entire time I was being subjected to this crap-fest.

Two redeeming qualities.

1. Special effects were nasty.
2. Scarlett Johansson
   

This entry was posted on Friday, July 22, 2005 at Friday, July 22, 2005. You can skip to the end and leave a response.