This sounds like something my mom would submit to a readers column in a magazine / newspaper. Ha. Like the one time, she found my brother's wallet in the laundry and noticed circular impressions through the leather. She almost died inside because he was like 13 years old and thought that her sweet, innocent baby was packing some condoms. She didn't want to invade his privacy but decided to open up his wallet to find out exactly what they were. Turns out they were pogs, yep, remember those. The circular things you slap with a piece of metal. Yep, no condoms, just pogs. Ohh T-Unit, such great MMP material.

So, take a look at this article. A distressed god mother was worried about a letter that her godson had written to a friend while staying at her house. I almost shat myself when I read this...

Question:
I hope you can help me with a problem I have with my godson. Last summer he visited me for two weeks and plans to return in July. When cleaning out the room he stays in, I found an unfinished correspondence to a chum in his hometown. In it he says he is going to our local pool to "scout some camel toads" (I believe thats's what it said, he had spilled some iced tea all over the desk when writing it and it damaged a lot of the papers.) I'm concerned he is doing drugs.

I tried to look for camel toads in a drug book, and I didn't find them, but I found references to some type of frog that people in another country lick to hallucinate. I don't want to approach him on this until I have more information.
He is a good boy in middle school whose parents do not even drink. Please let me know what camel toads are and how I might be able to tell if he is smoking, taking or locking them.

Perhaps I should have talked to his parents, but I don't want to jump the gun. Is this something the local authorities need to be alerted to in order to protect other patrons at the pool or surrounding area?

A concerned and uninformed reader.

Answer:
The iced tea did a number on the toads, so my younger, hipper coworkers tell me. what he undoubtedly wrote was "camel toes", a crude euphemism for; well, too tight pants worn by females.

The good news is that the expression has absolutely nothing to do with drugs. It has everything to do with why teenage boys go to the pool in the first place.

[special thanks to smitty for this amazing image.]

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